So I have been fighting heartily for a month against the sacrilege that America has commited against me, trying in vain to stop this insubordinate holiday known as "American Thanksgiving" from overshadowing a much more important event... namely, my 20th birthday.

It's ridiculous really.

But for the past month or so, every time any well-meaning American in the state of Washington (or, to be sure, any unfortunate Canadians I may or may not know) has mentioned their upcoming national holiday, the conversation has inevitably be rerouted to include my own personal take on the meaning of November 24th. Which was probably, a little obnoxious of me...

But, you know how it is. We as people, tend to be VERY self-concerned. And for me, being miles and miles away from home and all the people that I could count on to actually care about the fact that I have now been wandering aimlessly for TWO WHOLE DECADES, I, like most other self-involved humanoids out there, felt the instincts of self-preservation sneak up on me as my big day ran the risk of being overshadowed by a turkey.

I eventually got sick of it, or at least had the social graces to sense that if not yet then pretty soon everyone else would become so, and decided to "be a martyr" and let it go. I mean, I know I'm special. I know God loves me, and I know other people do too. And I can't wrangle them into caring about my birthday, and I was going to wind up looking like a fool doing so. So I gave up on it.

By then it was much too late.

My darling friends henceforth known as "the interns" spoiled me rotten, lavished me with attention and thoughtfulness, as did many other important people in my life, for the entire week leading up to my birthday, and in the end, self-promotion got trumped by sheer thankfulness.

Here's how it looked.

Saturday, November 19th- Ben Jensen (wonderful guy, and fellow intern, from Snohomish, WA) took me out to see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire for my birthday. It was great- we were a little close to the screen, though- and then afterwards we went over to his house where **surprise!** all the interns were waiting in the basement to throw me a birthday party! The interns had even picked up on the name of my favorite board game, Balderdash, which they then gave me for my birthday, and we then played, with great times resulting.

Monday, November 21st- At our intern meeting, the entire group blesses me immensely with words of encouragement and affirmation. More kind things were said than are even true about me, and I was so encouraged and felt so loved and blessed.

Wednesday, November 23rd- Doorbell rings. My darling best friend Sarah has sent me flowers all the way from Winnipeg, MB!

Right about at this point I surrendered. I mean, honestly, how can someone this blatantly and richly blessed continue her well-intended vendetta against a holiday of thankfulness? So there and then I told Jesus that I didn't need or want anything else for my birthday, I just wanted it to be over, and that I was very excited to spend a whole day feeling thankful, as I had been feeling so all week already.

So I opened all my cards that night and resolutely told my (host) family that my birthday was OVER.

Thursday, November 24th- American Thanksgiving. I celebrated with my (host) family, had a great day of card-playing and pie-eating, and finally acted at least a little bit more selfless and mature.

At the end of the day we met the Outtatown South Africa people. I accidentally let it slip out that I had turned 20 that day (I was provoked! Blayne told everyone we were all only 18-19) and before I could stop myself the entire Site was singing me Happy Birthday. So I almost made it the whole day... oh well.

Don't get me wrong here... this is NOT a complaint. I was and I am completely grateful, and I truly feel just cherished beyond what I deserved, expected, or even imagine. But I am painfully aware of the fact that I have a long way to go to be like Jesus. I mean, I've been going about this all wrong.

Here, this is what I'm getting at:

When [Jesus] noticed how the guests picked the places of honor at the table, he told them this parable: "When someone invites you to a wedding feast, do not take the place of honor, for a person more distinguished than you may have been invited. If so, the host who invited both of you will come and say to you, 'Give this man your seat.' Then, humiliated, you will have to take the least important place. But when you are invited, take the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he will say to you, 'Friend, move up to a better place.' Then you will be honored in the presence of all your fellow guests. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted." Luke 14:7-11

This is exactly what I did not do.

The moral of the story is that I am EXTREMELY blessed, and so VERY thankful, and that if I would just shut my mouth for once, I would maybe learn to handle both people's praise AND people's disregard with grace and dignity.

Labels: auto-biography, Seattle, spirituality, stupidity

While I was writing my re-cap of the past year and some, I started to write a more up-close reflection on my summer working with people with things like autism, down's syndrome, FAS, etc. Then I realized that people would be tired of reading a that point, so I took it all out of the recap and am recycling it into this post. One way or another, people, you're GOING to hear it!

Alright. So what did I learn? Well, I was stretched. I wanted to do this because I wasn't comfortable being uncomfortable around people with disabilities. I wanted to do this because I wanted to be challenged to love more, more deeply, more widely, more comfortably, and more unconditionally. And every client I worked with demanded something different, some different form of love. Love is patience. Love always protects the other. Love is persistent, persevering, refuses to quit on someone. Love shows kindness when kindness is the farthest thing from us. If you knew the clients I met this summer, you would understand. These people will teach you love, and they will challenge you in it. And they are blessings from God in your life, if you will embrace them.

I learned about people. I was blessed to work with some great people, Twila Ross- she is a true diamond in the rough, for real; and also Vanessa Jeske, whose blog contains some very honest and beautiful reflections on her experiences this summer working with special needs adults, check it out at: www.lostcanadianinamerica.blogspot.com/2005/08/smile.html - I strongly encourage you to read it- it is very thought-provoking and true.
At the same time, though, Vanessa, Twila, and I spent the summer watching in horror and disbelief as every member of the staff jostled for position, for favor, for self-gain. I am completely unable to understand how anyone can work at a job like that and still think that it's all about THEM. It doesn't make any sense to me.

I am humbled by these clients, and rightly so. People love to lord it over others, to make themselves look good by being "sensitive" to special needs people. But honestly, this summer, I did not work for the government of MB, I worked for these people. I served them. And rightly so. Jesus NEVER tells us to serve ourselves. He never says "Go, make money. Go gain. Take for yourselves." He never gives us the impression that we deserve any of the good that we recieve. In truth, we deserve much less, much worse. We are no better than anyone else.

What Jesus would say, and Paul did say was this: Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.
A far cry from my experience among the staff this summer. And clearly the most excellent way.

So we consider others better than ourselves. And we serve the poor, and the needy. And we do it in a way that reflects a belief that we are not reaching down to them, that we have no right to do so. But that we are reaching out, simply because we have been reached down to by Grace Himself. And this is the essence of our lives in Christ.

Labels: auto-biography

Alright, so "Little Miss Blogger" didn't really materialize... I started this blog after Outtatown, which is now a year and a half ago, and I then moved to Winnipeg, where I had crappy internet access, homework (yuck!), and not a lot of drive to blog. Sorry!

Alright... so highlights from the past 15+ months!

Summer- work with special needs kids or kids with learning disabilities... love it....

September- move to Winnipeg with the crazy and awesome Sarah Froese, a fellow Site 2 girl... hilarity ensues... most of it involves me getting things thrown at me... and folk guitar.

October- Kelly gets employed. First day at Radioshack goes down in "Worst Day Ever History"... long story short... Kelly falls of bike, scrapes open leg, hobbles in late, bleeding. There are tears. Not exactly employee of the month material.

Labels: auto-biography, update